I gossip about where I didn’t spend the day;
I am, completely broken,
I feel this hunger; I have been sucking secrets but my gaps ain’t satisfied.
I worry about what doesn’t make someone to stay alive,
I am carelessly haphazard.
I have not loved once, so I break hearts to prove.
I am, completely unshaken.

What have I accomplished other than hoping like an educated drunkard;
For the most important things that I destroy,
Wishing to feel their smiles after I have trodded them,
Is my ego saying that it is the only way for me to breathe?
I am, the devil in the circle.
Have I not blamed myself?
I am, a toothless liar!
I regret every moment I have spanked myself,
With a corroded thornful whip that has fire.

I am, sick and I am in real pain.
This pain stabs me,
To wait for the true judgement.
Now, I am tired.
What you see, hear, feel and think.
Is that what you think you know about me?
Don’t believe what you think,
I am always following a perverse movie script!
I cunningly dupe, every single person.
Including my true self,
That I imprisoned long time ago; without collecting the receipt.

I know, the real Truth is here,
I can be true for real and toss away my disastrous ego.
I know, the real Light is here,
I can be bright and stay out of the shadows that haunt me all the time.
I know, that the true Way is here,
I can be straight and stop defrauding myself.
I know, the originator of Life is here;
I can wake up from the grave,
That I dug and jumped into as if I am brave.
I have been tormenting myself in here,
Without knowing what breathing really feels like.
I can start living for the true reason I was created for.
I have the chance to cast away this dead body at the shore.
But, I still feel like enjoying the darkness,
It hurts.
My soul is lost, don’t laugh at me,
This is not part of the act I always pull, as a show.

I have lied to myself the whole time,
Why do you think I would have been honest with you?
Who do you think you are?
The only time I am honest, is right now and I feel like being kind.
I am suffering and I am lifeless,
I am completely out of my mind;
I am a complete mess.
When I am inside my senses,
I have some kind of finite power.
Immediately; I am fooling no one because I don’t have my lenses.
I am not asleep nor dreaming so I am a weak tower.
I am in true need of fixing;
I am crying out to the One who we were all accusing.
I need the One who died for me to rescue me;
  So that I can cleanly start over, from the beginning.